Most households have entered full-blown holiday mindset and are busy making memories. Looking back on my parents’ holiday traditions, I’m filled with a nostalgic blend of happiness and warm remembrance. I remember almost every detail, as the impressions of holiday traditions glide past, all accompanied by food, my Mom’s decorations (I was so excited when she went to the attic to bring them down!), fragrant evergreen needles on our fresh cut tree that my Dad cut down, and the constancy of carols in the background.

My daughter is still young (15 months) and this is only our second Christmas as a family unit, but I love the idea of establishing family rituals that we will repeat for years to come. There is immense value in establishing traditions for families. They create meaningful memories, especially for children, and provide something to look forward to year after year. The actions become associated with emotions, which in turn make the event even more special. Plus – they are so much fun!

Rituals help me answer the questions that are central to my life as a parent: How do we help our children recognize things that matter? Rituals have a way of stopping time and allowing us to enjoy the moment.

Establishing new family traditions doesn’t have to take much effort. Some of the most powerful traditions are extremely simple, but they acquire meaning through repetition. It could be the simple act of giving a book every Christmas Eve or giving a new pair of pajamas followed by a holiday-themed movie screening. Maybe it’s a group hike with family and friends before a Christmas Day meal. Or perhaps it is lighting the candles over dinner, baking the same cookie recipe year after year, decorating a gingerbread house together, going on a sleigh ride, or going out for hot chocolate after the holiday parade.

Don’t pursue perfection

Instead, choose activities you think your family will really enjoy. And don’t forget to savor the waiting as much as the outcome.

As for my family’s traditions so far, we select our tree to bring home the day after Thanksgiving. We purchase a new ornament each year, place the nativity that my parents bought while they were stationed in Germany, and have Christmas dinner at our house. Right now, my husband and I are trying to figure out how to prevent a toddler from taking ornaments off the tree!

Local Families’ Celebrations

I asked several local families what their holiday traditions are and their responses are heartwarming! Here are how some Wilmington area families will be capturing the joy of the season:

Eliza Feld, her husband, and their two young daughters celebrate Hanukkah in a multitude of ways.

Hanukkah is, of course, known as the festival of lights. 

“Leading up to and during the holiday we read stories about Hanukkah,” Eliza shared. “Each night, we light the candles, adding one more for each night, and say the two prayers after lighting. Then each child puts a quarter into a charity box called a tzedakah box in Hebrew or a pushke in Yiddish each night. When the box is full, the money is donated to charity. They also get a quarter for their bank.”

“We’ll open a small gift most nights next. It could be a toy, a book, pajamas, etc. One night, we’ll give the children a bigger gift. As the holiday is a celebration of the oil lasting eight days, we will typically include something made with oil for dinner. Homemade latkes tend to make an appearance at least one night during the week. Doughnuts are also eaten at least once during the holiday. Often, we’ll celebrate with friends and family during the holiday, playing with dreidels and gelt.” 

 

Flounder: Fresh and Frozen

Elizabeth Harlow Gray, her husband, Joseph, and their two sons, Fisher and Simon, love gathering family for Christmas Eve and stuffing a big flounder that Joseph gigged at one point that year and frozen for later.

“When it’s time to eat, someone is chosen to read A Floundering Tradition that’s been in the newspaper in Wilmington as long as we remember,” Elizabeth explained. “The person chosen may be a friend visiting or someone who is celebrating something special because it’s a “special honor” to be the reader  – and then we dig in!”

“We open one Christmas present under the tree on Christmas Eve. Christmas morning we all wear our matching pajamas, listen to holiday music and open our gifts one at a time as a family. We do this because it’s actually more fun watching someone open the gift you chose for them then actually opening your own.”

Oysters – and Eggs?

“On Christmas morning we have a tradition of eating fried oysters and eggs and Moravian sweet bread from Old Salem in Winston Salem (a very special place). Leading up to Christmas, we enjoy Christmas activities in town. We pick out a real Christmas tree and decorate it (Joseph holds up Fisher to put the star on top of the tree). We love attending our church, Saint Andrews Covenant Presbyterian Church, and singing beautiful Christmas songs. Enchanted Airlie and having hot chocolate while sitting on Santa’s Lap is so much fun! We also like family movie nights with Hallmark Christmas movies.”

“Most importantly, throughout the Christmas season, we read Christmas stories and talk about the birth of Jesus a lot because this is what the season is all about. Each year we also choose one child in need from the school [Elizabeth is a school counselor at Holly Shelter Middle]. We really enjoy going as a family to pick out the gifts for a child in need.”

Ornaments and Gingerbread

Mary Ellen Laughnan, her husband, and their two children, James and Julia, have lots of traditions. These include making homemade ornaments, baking and decorating a gingerbread house, making cookies for Santa, and hanging up ornaments on an advent calendar.

“We also always pick an evening to walk around Carolina Beach Lake Park with cocoa to look at the lights there,” said Mary Ellen. They also always participate in Polar Express and ringing in the New Year at New Year’s Noon at The Children’s Museum of Wilmington.

Holidays for a Military Family

Heather Eliason, her husband, Brandon (who is currently deployed with the U.S. Marine Corps), and their two children, Carlee and Coen, have different traditions depending on whose family they are spending the holidays with.

“If we are with Brandon’s family, we do Christmas Eve candlelight service, which is absolutely magical,” explained Heather. “We do a small gift exchange Christmas Eve and save the rest for Christmas morning. We do a Christmas Day dinner early afternoon and pretty much lounge all day.”

“If we spend the holidays with my family (which we’ve done the past two years since Brandon has been deployed) we do a big Christmas Eve party. The kids make all kinds of small bite appetizers. We have started the matching pajamas with our kids so my parents have adopted it as well. Before the party kicks off we all change into our pajamas. So cheesy but so fun! Everyone makes their plate and then we usually watch a Christmas movie. The kids open presents and then little kids go to bed.”

“Since Brandon hasn’t been with us the past couple years we have a second Christmas the exact same way when he gets home in spring. Matching pajamas, food, movie, presents etc.”

“Christmas Day is a big breakfast after presents usually made by my dad, and then church. Traditions leading up to Christmas include putting up the tree while my mom makes Thanksgiving dinner. We then drive around to see the lights with snacks and big blankets in our pajamas. One of our favorite things is making “Darnell apple things”- like individual apple pies rolled up. We DIY an ornament with our updated family picture, host a cookie exchange, make angel wing cookies the traditional polish way and sponsor a family from our church.”

A home filled family and love

Alexa Miller and Bert Little started their own Christmas traditions soon after their daughter, Luna, was born almost two years ago.

“We’ve started decorating our tree together after Thanksgiving,” Alexa shared. “Every year we have our family come stay for the holidays. It’s a week filled with cooking, Christmas movies, and our favorite card game (Herbie). I also make my great-grandmother’s molasses cookies every Christmas.”

Every year Tiffany Sasser gives her daughter, Moriah, and son, J.J., pajamas on Christmas Eve with one rule – they must all wear their pajamas while they drive around and enjoy the neighborhood holiday light displays. They also make sugar cookies from scratch while trimming their tree with a sting of popcorn garland.

Let these stories from real families and your neighbors inspire you this holiday season.

If you are looking for more holiday inspiration, read all of our holiday posts. Stay tuned and follow us on social media, as we have more fabulous seasonal posts coming.